How to compliment a girl without being creepy
Understanding the social dynamics of a compliment:
|In the modern world of today very few things are really free, and even if something is free, it’s most often only free because the provider has some agenda behind offering you that thing for free!
This is for example the case with free sample products, they are offered to you (the potential consumers) for free because the provider what you/them to buy a product. It’s useful to notice how people are “used” to this connection between getting something “free” and that the provider has some hidden “agenda” with this “free offer”! And because people are “used” to this connection most people thus expect that if they get something for free then there is usually something in it for the donor.
The average person is presented to promotional offers like described above, you of all people are actually being exposed to such an offer right now! Because in the sidebar of this page I offer you to gain access to a number of free eBooks, all you have to do is to entering a few of your personal contact information’s, and then you’ll get full access. Some people do this because it’s a believable and fair “deal” to them, they understand the deal: We get your email and you get access to some of our premium eBooks for free.
When you give somebody a compliment, it’s actually very useful to understand: “Why people accept such a “free” offer”. Because when you give somebody a compliment its actually a lot offering the some gift for FREE.
The button-line here is:
If a “deal” isn’t believable – people will be VERY reluctant to that such deal.
The reason is that people won’t accept “gifts” that they don’t feel they deserve!
Not convinced? Okay – here’s a quick example:
I’ll bed that 99% of all people wouldn’t take this offer, simply because it’s not believable!
It’s to go to be true, so people will expect that there is something “fishy” about it. Because it makes no sense, they have done nothing to deserve a free Farrari Enzo, so they would fear that it would be some kind of “trick-offer”, or that I would at least have some kind of hidden agenda with this FREE offer.
You can try this out yourself;
If I wanted somebody to really turn up and claim the Farrari I had to make them feel that they deserved it, If I ask them to give their to complete some hard task for a year, then I’ll bet you that their would be a much bigger chance that someone would show up, because they would then see that they have to give something up to get something, and thats makes it a believable and thus much more trustworthy offer.
This is a physiological phenomenon that hold true in most cases, the thing is that; people won’t appreciate anything that they don’t feel they actually deserve.
So, How do you compliment a girl?
Once you understand the dynamics described above, it’s actually pretty simple. If you want to give someone something for “free” (Like a complement) you have to tell them “whats in it for you” otherwise they won’t really take the deal because it seems to good to be true.
The moment they understand what it for you, they will no longer worry if you have some hidden agenda for being so nice to them, because they know you are nice to them.
|Okay. it’s time to give you a real life example (of me giving a compliment to a girl):
Further insight on compliments..
|Videos on: How to give and utilize a compliments:
|The art of giving a great compliment
||The shit (compliment) sandwich