How to get out of the friend zone

I don’t know if you have ever experienced a girl putting you in the freindzone? It usually happens because you fail to make a move on her in time, with often means that your relationship with her ended up being platonic and thus she puts you in her friend zone.

How to AVOID getting caught in the friend zone?

Three word: STATEMENTS OF INTENT (Write this down, because this is probably the single most useful and powerful seduction technique you will stumble upon this year)

When I first realized the powers in using a statement of intent (SOI) I thanked god for my new and very much improved social skills (and I’m NOT religious). SOI has one purpose and that to make the girl know where you want to interaction to go, to let her know that you are interested in a romantic relationship, the moment you use a SOI you can’t end up friend-zone-land because you just made it clear that you are interested in a sexual relationship with her, and thus she has to break it up with your or have a romantic relation with you.

Why is this so powerful, why does it help you seduce her?

Okay to really expand on this important topic, you have to understand that the reason why guys are getting stock in the friendzone with a girl. Maybe you have even been there yourself, have you tried to be in a great conversation with a girl, but then the it that began to stagnate on you, maybe you didn’t realize it at the time but you simply just fail to escalate the relationship, in practice you actually fail to state you romantic intentions.

Okay pretty simple problem and it actually an easy fix all you have to do is to make you intention clear for the girl? Well, normally a guy would show their intentions by physical or verbal escalations. Social escalations like these are actually natural way of showing once intent in a relationship with a girl, the problem is though that these two “tools” require a high level of social calibration. For example; Before you can be successful with plain physical escalations you have to have a perfect feel of how exactly to touch her, how much, how hard, where and when to touch her, otherwise there is a big chance that you will come on to her too strong or too quick, or in some other way uncalibrated. You essentially have to have a strong sense of what she wants and when she wants it, initially this is why physical escalation is a bit harder to master right from the start.

About physical escalations:

Physical escalation are great, but if you don’t have too much experience in dating, there is a high probability that you will come on too fast, and thus you will force her to stop you because she doesn’t want to appear easy (slutty).

About verbal escalations:

Verbal escalations are when you directly ask her or make a statement about you and her being romantically evolved. If you openly ask her to be romantic with you, you kind of force her to take a position, you force her to decide right there and then if she want to be with you, this will naturally kills the sexual tension between you, because first of all you ask her to make the decision and thus lead the relationship, secondly at the moment she says: “yes or no” the intriguing factor of not knowing how it’s going to end between you is going to end and thus some of the sexual tension dies. Thirdly, as mentioned above if she can’t commit to soon because of her fear to appear cheap or slutty, so she might say “no” though she secretly doesn’t want you to stop escalating.

If you do not have great sense of calibration you might screw her attraction for you up, with the to methods mentioned above.

Okay, so what is the solution?

You can smoothly show you intentions (and thus make it sexual) with an SOI.

There are of cause an endless number of ways that you can tell her that you are romantically interested in her, but I have found that a SOI works the best when she doesn’t have to commit/or not commit to whatever you said you wanted. Thus you should structure your “Statement of Intent” in a way that does not require her to answer them with a yes or no. A “Statement of Intent” is done right when you state your intentions without either of you having to really commit to this goal. The trick is that you are letting her in on what you want from her, while you are not asking her to give hers accept, this is so powerful, because you show her that you are not afraid to escalate; yet you don’t put any pressure on either of you to do so. She doesn’t have to fear looking like a slut because she didn’t have to reveal if she is interested (if she stays – she’s interested). A SOI allow you to be very straightforward with what you want, without putting any pressure on her.

Okay I think it’s time for a few examples: You are as always very welcome to use them yourself but I would recommend you that you make up your own.

  • “Hmm the last 10 minutes has been a struggle for me, I just can’t stop thinking about kissing your very kissable lips, but I think you have to get to know me better before I do something like that.

 

  • “Wow – You are a very [creative] person, that is really sexy, stop it now – you are turning me on” “No seriously – Stop It – If you keep telling me all this cool stuff about you, I am not going to be able to control myself.”

 

  • “You are so passionate about [insert subject of the conversation], I am really struggling hard not to take you home right now, coz you’re so kissable.”

 

  • “Listening to you talks unbearable for me, you almost make me sick – [small pause] – your voice is too sensual, you better stop. I better go to the [bathroom ect] to compose myself for a minute. Don’t go anywhere, I’ll be right back”

 

  • “I really can’t stop thinking about taking you home, but you have to try just a little to get to know you better first.”

 

  • “Honestly I can’t get this image out of my head, of [me kissing you all over your sexy body], but I just realized that I don’t really know you that well. So you have to tell me something interesting about yourself – something that most people don’t know about you”
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Hey Markus here, I'm the founder and humble author this website.    

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